The whole "retarded" "gay" thing...
So my kids are like many other's in today's society. They say things and use certain words that are not deemed politically correct and or polite. Those two words are "retard" or "retarded" and "gay". As in, "that's retarded" or "that's so gay". I've even said those same things a time or two myself just by overhearing it again and again and again. EVERYONE says it.
However....if everyone jumped off a bridge, would you? (thanks, previous generations for brining us that cliche).
A while back I started on a mission to break my kids of that particularly nasty habit. Both are offensive and just flat out mean. First of all, "retarded" means to be delayed. But "to be delayed" is not the same thing as being dumb or stupid, which, when used in the context of, "that's retarded" is what it's being used as. That debate could go on and on forever about dumb and stupid, et al. But IT IS NOT THE SAME THING!
Now let's move on to "that's so gay". Gay means merry, jovial, happy, etc, and homosexual. I'm not sure why that word means both of those things, they just do. Anyway, I don't think being gay is a choice. I think you are born gay or you are born straight. I also know my opinion is not shared by everyone. And that's ok. Just remember that if you decide to comment your opinion on my post, you must be respectful. I honestly believe it is a gut feeling, a reaction, an attraction, etc. For instance, I am not attracted to women. I'm also not attracted to Asians, African Americans or Hispanics. It's not being a bigot, prejudiced or anything of the sort. It's what I am attacted to. Maybe you are definitely not attracted to redheads. Maybe you only like blonds. It's an attraction. I don't see that the preference is any different. Don't misunderstand. I think there are some very interesting and lovely looking Asians, Hispanics, etc. I appreciate beauty and good looks just like everyone else. And I'm not saying I would never date someone that wasn't white (well, yes I am, but it's because I'm married, not because I'm a racist!) I'm probably making my point in a very jumbled way. But the point actually is this: I'm trying to give my kids a wider vocabulary. Those words are hurtful and only "trendy" because we've gotten lazy at teaching proper use of language and we've given up on morals.
Over the last 2 days Ryan has seen two tv commercials talking about using "gay" to describe something as "dumb or stupid". He looked at me and said, "Ok, mom, wow, it's what you've been telling me!" And I said, "Yes, son, do you see now how cool and trendy and ahead of the times I am?" No, really, I just smirked, shook my head and said, "yeah, see!!!" So he's come up with another word he's using besides "gay" or "retard/retarded" to describe something he doesn't like. I'm proud of him for actually being aware now that this is real, it's bullying and it's just plain sad. I know he was never saying it to be a bully or to be mean, it was just a habit and is considered the "norm" nowadays. He's realizing that just because it's the "norm" it doesn't make it right.
Anyway, those are my opinions and you may now respectfully comment! lol
However....if everyone jumped off a bridge, would you? (thanks, previous generations for brining us that cliche).
A while back I started on a mission to break my kids of that particularly nasty habit. Both are offensive and just flat out mean. First of all, "retarded" means to be delayed. But "to be delayed" is not the same thing as being dumb or stupid, which, when used in the context of, "that's retarded" is what it's being used as. That debate could go on and on forever about dumb and stupid, et al. But IT IS NOT THE SAME THING!
Now let's move on to "that's so gay". Gay means merry, jovial, happy, etc, and homosexual. I'm not sure why that word means both of those things, they just do. Anyway, I don't think being gay is a choice. I think you are born gay or you are born straight. I also know my opinion is not shared by everyone. And that's ok. Just remember that if you decide to comment your opinion on my post, you must be respectful. I honestly believe it is a gut feeling, a reaction, an attraction, etc. For instance, I am not attracted to women. I'm also not attracted to Asians, African Americans or Hispanics. It's not being a bigot, prejudiced or anything of the sort. It's what I am attacted to. Maybe you are definitely not attracted to redheads. Maybe you only like blonds. It's an attraction. I don't see that the preference is any different. Don't misunderstand. I think there are some very interesting and lovely looking Asians, Hispanics, etc. I appreciate beauty and good looks just like everyone else. And I'm not saying I would never date someone that wasn't white (well, yes I am, but it's because I'm married, not because I'm a racist!) I'm probably making my point in a very jumbled way. But the point actually is this: I'm trying to give my kids a wider vocabulary. Those words are hurtful and only "trendy" because we've gotten lazy at teaching proper use of language and we've given up on morals.
Over the last 2 days Ryan has seen two tv commercials talking about using "gay" to describe something as "dumb or stupid". He looked at me and said, "Ok, mom, wow, it's what you've been telling me!" And I said, "Yes, son, do you see now how cool and trendy and ahead of the times I am?" No, really, I just smirked, shook my head and said, "yeah, see!!!" So he's come up with another word he's using besides "gay" or "retard/retarded" to describe something he doesn't like. I'm proud of him for actually being aware now that this is real, it's bullying and it's just plain sad. I know he was never saying it to be a bully or to be mean, it was just a habit and is considered the "norm" nowadays. He's realizing that just because it's the "norm" it doesn't make it right.
Anyway, those are my opinions and you may now respectfully comment! lol
5 comments:
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Great post - full of lessons that adults can learn from too!
Thanks for linking up with Super Stalker Sunday hop. There are so many wonderful blogs participating, I hope you've found a few that you enjoy. Be sure to join us again next week!
Best,
Emily from Nap Time Is My Time
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What a great post! I have to admit I say "that's so retarded" sometimes. Rarely but it happens. I don't say the gay thing and I don't believe my kids to either. We'll work on the other!
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You are such a good mom. I'am so proud of you!