Gender Speak

Not too long ago, my dad and I had a conversation about how advertisers have started to make men and boys look like buffoons in their commercials and merchandisers often "dumb it down" for men in regards to, well, just about everything. 

It's true.  At least in part. 

But...

Men are simple creatures.  It's not rocket science to figure out what appeals to them, how it appeals to them and why it appeals to them. 

Men get hungry.  They put the food in the hole.

Women get hungry.  This is the inner monologue:  "I feel like having something crunchy:  Crunchy as in chips or crunchy as in carrots?  Carrots dipped in ranch?  Dip!  Ohhh, dip sounds good.  Chips and dip!  Wait, I don't have any dip.  I'm not sure if we have any chips either because he might have eaten them all.  Carrots it is.  With dip.  Ranch dip.  Wait...when did I last buy Ranch?  Is it still good?  I can't see the date on the bottle because when he opened the bottle he tore off the little paper thingy where they stamp the date.  Is this the newer bottle of Ranch or is this the old one because the old one was like, super old and I don't want to eat old Ranch.  Maybe crunchy is out.  Ok, I'll make a sandwich.  Should I use sourdough or wheat?  Do I have regular mustard or spicy mustard?  Spicy is better on most sandwiches.  Is the bread fresh and soft?  No.  Hmm, I'll toast it.  But I don't really feel like having a toasted sandwich because sometimes it gets to toasty and then it scratches the roof of my mouth.  But the bread is a little dry and I don't like dry bread.  But I sometimes like toast...which is dry bread...  Maybe I'll have some taquitos.  Pop them in the microwave, add some sour cream (for dipping, of course)...oh, someone left the box open and now they are dried out.  But they were frozen so can they really be dried out?  Maybe.  Maybe not.  But they probably "taste" like freezer.  No thanks.  Hmm, a can of soup?  To hot for soup.  Besides if the spoon isn't big enough it's a big disaster.  If the spoon is too big it's a different sort of disaster and all the spoons are dirty anyway because he forgot to run the dishwasher.  I'll just have a V8 and a cheese stick and call it good."

Maybe that's just me?

Anyway....

Here's the difference between directions on men's face wash and women's face wash:

Directions: Wet your face, apply face wash and then rinse.

Directions:  One or two pumps is plenty.  Splash face with water and massage cleanser evenly over entire face using a gentle circular motion to create a light, creamy lather.  Rinse thoroughly with warm water.  For best results use morning and night. 

Way too many words to just wash your face, ladies! 

It's not really "dumbing it down", it's just basic "caveman" communication.  Women need the details, the flowery words to make them feel better about spending $20 on face wash instead of $6.49 for some manly scented scrub. 

I started using caveman communication with my boys when I realized I was using way too many words to get them to do their chores.  "Zach!  Clothes! In washer! Now!"  "Ryan! Trash! Now!" 
Or even, "Boys!  Dinner! Eat!"

I still use a lot of words sometimes (ok, almost all the time) to get simple messages across but I LIKE using all my words. Composing an email can take a long time because I debate over what to say and how to say it and if I should use certain words or not certain words.  Maybe that's just me?

I live in a house full of "cavemen" so I understand it's not dumbing it down, it's just a matter of simplifying things.  They understand it and things get done.  Nothing dumb about that.